Wicked!!

The most amazing musical I have ever seen! Actually, the only one. Still, it was really good. This has been one of the best birthday's ever. On Wednesday, I had a really big argument with Michael that finally brought whatever we had left in our relationship to a close. I acted out of anger and I was cruel. So was he. He decided we had nothing left, not even a friendship and I cried. He showed no emotion. It was over. All that was left was two beautiful boys that show me of a time when love was enough. It was enough to have them, and the memories of a great us live inside of them. So it was a very hard day to say the least. Very hard to answer the phone at work because I kept crying and all I wanted to do was crawl under a rock. I ended up going to dinner with Beth and we had an ok time. It was decent, we laughed and got along. Then we went to Brian's house to have drinks...I tried something called Cherry Dr. It was very good. I passed out at about 1:00 and got up at 6:30 to go home. From there I met my mother, did laundry(ALL OF IT!!) and she took me out to lunch. It was very nice and I really wanted to be around people that I cared about. She came to watch the kids at about 5:00. Getting ready couldn't have taken longer and I was in such a hurry. We left, traffic took forever and we got there 15 min late, but the show was so good, it kind of made up for it. It was a really nice birthday indeed. Now, seeing that my birthday fell on Valentine's day. That was the sad part. I am going to have to get used to it. No flowers, no hearts, no cards, no love... I have had it for nine years now and I guess took it for granted, but I really wanted it. I gave Michael his Valentine's gift, that took far too long to make. A CD with all the songs that I could think of that reminded me of our past. But don'tcha know that I burned the CD wrong so he couldn't play it. He did appreciate the poem that took me weeks and it felt good for him to say that I was getting better at writing. I guess I owe to you since I have pretty much written everything that I have felt in this blog. So thank you blog, you are helping me express myself. As we drew closer to the end of the night and I was waiting in the car while he brought roses to his best friend, I realized that I am far from any level of friendship with him. It was like this was my birthday and he felt the need to give me one last good one. A great going away gift. I just started to feel really down knowing that it was it. And once I went to sleep my dream would be over.